Review: Canada's Drag Race, S1 E1 Eh-Laganza Eh-Xtravaganza

Each week Toronto based comedian Chris Middleton will review the latest episode of Canada’s Drag Race. The Canadian version of the worldwide phenomenon RuPaul’s Drag Race premiered July 2 on Crave. The main judges and mentors are Stacey McKenzie, Brooke Lynn Hytes, and Jeffrey Bowyer-Chapman.

Here we are! After a lot of talks, a trip to Michael’s for some glittery maple leaves, and a raid of a public access television equipment box, we’ve finally got Canada’s Drag Race!

And it’s CANADA’s Drag Race, no RuPaul in the title. Though she’s still “involved,” she couldn’t be bothered to take the Megabus up to Canada. She probably realized we already had a thriving oil industry, but she couldn’t frack into. At least the 12 Canadian Queens can win real prizes and not just pins (sorry UK). These queens have a chance to win the grand prize of 100 thousand dollars and . . . a year's worth of stays at Hilton Hotels? Oof, obviously these travel prizes haven’t aged well.

The mini challenge this week was a photo shoot up a Rocky Mountain, and the queens really blew me away! Since this was the first episode, and there are a LOT of girls, I’ll give you my three word impression of each based on entrance looks and the mini challenge:

Ilona Verley (Vancouver): salacious, west-coast, rich.

Priyanka (Toronto): children’s-TV-host, icon, evil-eye.

Rita Baga (Montreal): intergalactic, not-that-old-bitch, Highlander.

Scarlett Bobo (Toronto): punk, clown, bo...bo.

Kiara (Montreal): hot, model, bubblegum-executive.

Anastarzia Anaquway (East York (is in Toronto but WHATEVER): seamstress, royalty, MOTHA.

Tynomi Banks (Toronto): legend, icon, fierce, star, deserved-more-than-three-words, should’ve-won-this-mini-challenge.

BOA aka Bitch On Arrival (Toronto): utterly-hilarious, bad-head, “personality”.

Lemon (Toronto, but NYC): sour, young, from-New-York.

Kyne (Kitchener-Waterloo): cocky, polished, Cruella-da-hoe.

Juice Boxx (Toronto): graceful, elegant, stuck-on-my-fishnets-and-fell-into-my-heart.

Jimbo (Victoria): clown, oh-wow, AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

The winner of the mini challenge was Kyne, and she got to assign the themed boxes for each queen's “Canuck couture” design challenge. I’m always a fan of an episode one design challenge, because it separates the queens who can create a look (Jimbo) from the queens who just have a lot of money (Lemon).

The tops on the Canuck couture runway were interesting. Jimbo created an AMAZING dress from her RainBLow It Up box and I think it should’ve won; but who am I to award actual costume making skills for a design challenge? Rita Baga had an amazing coat and a fine dress from her Quebec-Froid box, but I think she took the win with those cheese curds. With her Man of Green Gay-bles box BOA broke the cardinal sin of a design challenge (corset with a piece of fabric around her waist) but all eyes were on her (from the judges and the potatoes). GENUINELY surprised Starzey and Kiara weren’t top, so they’ll just be MY tops.

The bottoms were well placed except for Kyne. Though she dropped the ball from the ankles down with her Yukon Gold Digger box, her spot should’ve been BOA’s. Lemon really just threw everything from her Jock Strap box on and went “lol, whutz sports? I’m gAeYY.” Also, it’s not anime, it’s embarrassing. I think Juice Boxx just captured the truly horrid nature of Much Music Video Dances from her Much Ru-Sic Video Prance box.

The lip sync this week was between Lemon and Juice Boxx. Can we PLEASE stop being impressed by splits? Looking at you Elisha Cuthbert! Juice sold the song, and I will NOT have the editors telling me otherwise. But the American won another week on Canada’s Drag Race. Sorry Juice, you got caught in your tights, and in our hearts.

Between the stilted line deliveries, the unhelpful critiques (bar Stacey McKenzie), and the low quality aesthetic, Canada’s Drag Race really captured all the same beats as season one of RuPaul’s Drag Race (save for the vaseline filter)!

It’s only episode one, so I’m hoping this show can find its footing, and a better sound designer, for the remaining episodes.

The Spoilers:

Mini Challenge: Rocky Mountain Photo Shoot
Mini Challenge Winner: Kyne
Pit Crew: HOT
Maxi Challenge: Oh Canada Design Challenge, Canuck couture
Winner: Rita Baga
Extra Special Guest Host: Elisha Cuthbert
Lip Sync: Lemon vs Juice Boxx to "I Really Like You" by Carly Rae Jepsen
Eliminated: Juice Boxx

Canada’s Drag Race airs Thursdays at 9 pm ET on Crave.

Canada's Drag Race now streaming on Crave.